Procedural Writing Learning Story

We have been learning to describe a process.

When I write, I need to think about the ideas, structure & language, organization, vocabulary, sentences, spelling and punctuation I use.  

Ideas	Structure and Language	Organization	Vocabulary	Sentence Structure	Spelling	Punctuation
-write using a range of ideas, experiences or items of information -confidently shape my ideas for effect -create content that is concise and relevant to the curriculum task -support my ideas with precise detail -uses ‘show not tell’ when appropriate	-deliberately choose a clear, controlled and logical text structure to suit the audience and purpose -show creativity and innovation when creating texts for my audience -choose appropriate adjective, verbs, nouns and adverbs.	-write in structured, well developed paragraphs that flow well from one to the next within the text -use linking words and phrases to link paragraphs for effect -Use a bullet point or number to separate the different steps	-maintain audience interest through content, humour and language choices -use language that is suitable to the topic and purpose, and discuss these choices with others -deliberately use written and visual language features when appropriate to enhance my writing; e.g similes, metaphors, personification, hyperbole, rhetorical question and diagrams -use a range of precise vocabulary to communicate meaning	-use a variety of sentence structures, beginnings and lengths to give effect -use complex sentences that are grammatically correct -use some conjunctions correctly eg: FANBOYS (for, and, nor, but, or, yet, so) -use some complex sentences	-write all basic sound and spelling patterns and use spelling rules to write unknown words -spell words correctly by drawing on knowledge of how words work	-use all basic punctuation independently -attempt more complex punctuation (eg semicolons, colons, parentheses).

Here is a piece of writing I did this term.  

I was writing to describe the process that enables a lightbulb to turn on.  Notice how I used feedback to improve my work.

To make a light bulb work you need these things.

1. 2 wires.
2. 1 battery.
3. 1 light bulb.
4. 1 switch.

1.So first, you need to connect the 2 wires to the battery.

2.Second, connect the wires to the lightbulb as well.

3.Third step, add a switch when you've done that.

4.Fourth step you can switch the switch then.

5.lastly the electricity from the battery will power through the wire to the light bulb then it will work.

Buddy Feedback:can you please check your spelling again-Seiola

Teacher Feedback:  You have got a great structure with clear steps. You’ve used specific words to help your reader know what you are talking about.  Can you change some of the ‘first’ words to make them better time connectives.